SugarDaddyForMe

After a long and arduous discussion about the existence of “light black” with my sugar daddy, I called my girlfriend, who’s another sugar baby.

I ranted about Z to her for a few, let the frustration out, and then went on to catch up with her. It’d been a while since we saw each other, shoot, since we even talked! I think I saw her last September, and last we spoke, she was on her way to meet a pot SD out of town. Well as it turned out, she never left and is having all of her things moved to her in the next few days!

She discovered a sugar baby life for herself in her new location. She has a few sugar daddies who fly into town to see her, and the rest of the time, she’s working on re-building her old business! Almost 3 years ago, she had to sell her business because of the start of the recession.

The line of work she was in was the first to go with the rise of economic difficulty on Wall Street. With the closing of the business’ doors, she chose the option to date older men with money. She took it, and from it, business opportunity. She has been dating wealthy older men since. It’s been almost 3 years since she closed the doors to her business and started sugar daddy dating. She’s the one who got me into this sugar baby gig in the first place.

Right now, between dating sugar daddies and other side gigs, she makes about $15,000 a month

Her personal overhead and expenses are approx. $10,000 a month

That leaves her with an additional $5000 or so to invest or play with!

She’s doing alright I’d say. Not that she’s the average for any sugar baby though, she’s quite the opposite! She’s always had particularly good taste in rich men to help her, and bad taste in men to fall in love with, (I tell her this all the time).

The thing about my girlfriend is that she’s not as materialistic as you might think. I mean, she loves a designer handbag like the rest of us, but her outlook in the past 10 years I’ve known her has always been positive and geared toward the well-being of her family.

She had to scrape the bottom of barrel to pay her share of bills, but she always did it knowing she wanted more for herself. She’s a resilient and hard-working woman who just happened to need a helping hand at times. Nothing was beneath her when it came to showing up, putting in a day’s work, and doing so with a smile on her face.

I guess I’m just in awe of a sugar baby with such spirit and gumption, I wish we all were so inclined to have that sort of candor.

I’m going to visit her at her new 5400 sq. ft. home soon I hope, and will bring back with me, many stories of our adventure!

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The thing with sugar daddy relationships, mutual arrangements, and NSA connections is that they represent the best parts of relationships, the good stuff, the sweet stuff.

Sound too good to be true? It’s not. It’s a way of life, people gravitate toward it because — well who wouldn’t want all of the good parts of a relationship and none of the bad? (Are you scratching your head to ponder that?)

I compiled a list of reasons why sugar daddies choose a mutually beneficial relationship and why you should too! Here are great reasons to be a Sugar Daddy:

20. Bitches just ain’t worth the time anymore

19. Your last girlfriend/wife left you for someone more successful than you

18. You despise or are allergic to commitment

17. You will rule the world

16. Everyone around you will be envious and jealous

15. Other men will wonder what your secret is– don’t tell them

14. Think about it, man cave, 24/7/365

13. Gorgeous women will tell you you’re hot, even if you’re not

12. R-e-s-p-e-c-t, you’re doing what all men dream of doing

11. Other men look up to you

10. More women will want to date you

9. Hotter women will want to date you

8. Sugar babies do what their told, well, most of the time

7. You can finally feel like you’re Charlie Sheen. The winning Charlie Sheen

6. Sugar babies will try hard to look good for you at all times

5. Sugar babies will go home when you want them to

4. You don’t have to be rich- just generous with what you have

3. No more arguments about how fat she looks, your wandering eyes, or who the other woman is

2. A greater possibility of being in a threesome– if you’re into that sort of thing

1. Amazing sex with uninhibited sugar babies– and more of it!

Note: Sugar daddies beware, there are some sugar babies under the impression that they can be your no-sex platonic friend and you will buy them things.

What, their personalities and company are that amazing?!? Yeah right, maybe if you’re a 10!

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I had my meeting with pot sugar daddy Z to discuss the possible arrangement he and I could have in the future. That’s the thing with these sugar daddy dating meetings– you just have to have em! I met this one through sugarsugar.

He narrowed down the specifics of what he wanted: a part-time GFE (with potential for more) and blow-jobs.

So… neither of his needs would be an issue for me to fulfill, I just had to see whether or not he could satisfy mine.

I curtly smiled at his requests (thinking of how dreadfully easy they were), stopped, and waited for him to inquire about my needs in an arrangement. I gently touched his knee when I leaned in to tell him what I wanted. I whispered into his ear:

“I would love to do that for you and more, but I’m going to need a little breathing room to make that happen”, then I sat back gingerly and waited for his response.

“I’m sure we can work something out,” Z said ever so matter-of-factly. He reached into his murse (man-purse) and pulled out a white nondescript envelope and put it on the table. We were in a Coffee Bean so white envelopes passing over these tables happened quite often and was not unusual.

“This is for your time,” sugar daddy Z said, “I will take care of some of the bills you have, and please let me know if you need anything else baby.”

This was too easy—it never happens like that! Sugar daddy tells you his needs, sugar baby tells him her needs, and all are welcomed and met simultaneously..

I started to get a little turned on by the ease of the situation and hot with desire. My lips must have been flushed because I started to feel hot all over and Z noticed. I haven’t known him long but I can tell when he gets turned on, besides the hard bulge in his pants, I mean. Which there was– a bulge in his pants, that is…

We took the rest of the afternoon off to rumple the sheets. When I went home that evening, I looked in the envelope and discovered $500. Not bad, considering I had some of the best sex I’ve ever had and will again! Plus, he didn’t think the blow job was bad either–

I went out with a pot SD for the second time on Sunday night and had a rather scandalist evening!

I try to remain friendly with most of my ex-SDs, I keep them at arm’s length anyway, so if I happen to run into one whilst out with another, nothing gets too uncomfortable. It’s proven to be a smart move thus far because some long-past SDs have seen me out with another SD, then called me to go out soon after. Seeing me had reminded them how cool they thought I was…

Clean breaks, no hard feelings, everyone wins– right?

Sunday night was the exception. So this newer pot SD took me to dinner…

Side Note: This man is still just a pot because while we’ve discussed that we want similar things from an arrangement, he hasn’t quite committed, though a handbag was bought by way of his cc as a sort of sugar-baby retainer.

…Yes, dinner. A great little place in downtown Phx…

Great wine?

Check.

Great food?

Absolutely.

Hefty bill taken care of by SD?

Done and done (thank you very much)

So, this SD (we’ll dub him Z until he makes an impression) kept telling me he had a surprise after dinner. Post vino and eats, we got into his classic Merc in mint condition (I absolutely luve cars like that!!), and he whisked me off to the next unknown destination!

Apparently this SD listens—because the surprise destination was to see a show, a band I’ve really been into! I don’t even think he’d ever listened to their music! Woo-hoo!

Upon arrival, getting out of the merc in my adorable little outfit, there in my periphery I saw my last crazy SD—the one exception to the rule of staying on good terms! Yikes—luckily, Z loves the school marm look, so as I was sporting my new Persols, I could fuss with them enough to give the illusion of not making eye contact or seeing my crazy ex-SD.

So this last SD, the dentist, is a weirdo with a capital C (the creepster, I’ll tell you more about him at a later date)!

There the dentist was, eerily close to us as we tried to enjoy the show, I didn’t want to leave my date alone! But before my bladder was about to explode, (not a good impression), I excused myself to the restroom and the dentist followed me.

Just as I was about to lock the one-stall bathroom, he barged through, pressed me up against the cold tile like he was either going to fuck or kill me, and asked me what I was thinking by being there! Eww yuck, he smelled like sweat as I remembered he did.

I found that with the dentist, I have to remain calm and silent—no response, and he usually walks away angry, but I walk away unscathed.

So I didn’t respond (or even think about how he smelled so I wouldn’t lose my meal) he gave my throat a good squeeze and left the bathroom.

I exited the water closet and joined Z for the rest of the amazing, albeit my mind was elsewhere, show… The dentist had, lucky for me, left before I returned to Z so I didn’t have the look of fear about me.

I’ve dealt with the dentist before, and had to wear scarves after close encounters with his grip so I know the drill. Z never questioned my stall adventure and I never let on, the pot SD would think I was the problem for sure! Charlie Sheen and his goddesses are a great example of a scandalous arrangement, full of crazy and blame.

I have another date with Z this week for a “talk” (why do they always have to preface uncomfortable talks as “talks”) to discuss our future arrangement. Stupid dentists.

Dear Mr. Sheen,

Like everyone else, I’ve been enjoying your recent media appearances. But for different reasons. While others are glued to the tabloids thinking they see a man self-immolating his life and career, I believe I’m watching a man become a role model for millions of other men who, though socially obligated to deny it, are gut-wrenchingly envious of the life you lead.

“Most men lead lives of quiet desperation and go to the grave with the song still in them.” -Thoreau

It’s a shame so many men feel forced to deny themselves the pursuit of happiness. Though happiness is defined differently by each individual – financial success, self-worth, creative expression – the common foundation is our appetite for women. Having the interest of a beautiful woman bolsters our confidence, positions us in society, and offers opportunities to creatively explore our sexual instincts.

I’ve seen timid, unexceptional males become self-assured, world-stomping supermen through the power of, frankly, knowing they can have any woman they want.  And my personal projects, SugarSugar.com and FinancialArrangement.com, facilitate men doing just that.

While I’m sure you’re aware of websites that offer similar services, mine are different because they are informed by my own experiences overcoming the cultural expectations surrounding male-female interaction, and becoming a fulfilled individual on my own terms. I’m not particularly concerned with the financial prospects for them – I only want to help others enjoy what I’ve found, and what I perceive you discovered long ago: the path to happiness.

I don’t have an ulterior agenda for this letter. I have nothing to offer that you don’t already have ready access to. I only suggest that if you agree with my cause, and are willing (some might say crazy) enough to support it, I would be thrilled to work with you in any capacity to help men of all stature enjoy even a fraction of what you have created for yourself.

I hope this letter finds you with continued success. The quiet millions are behind you.

Very sincerely,

Paul Madison

Founder, SugarSugar.com/FinancialArrangement.com

With all the buzz and excitement of the earthquake in Japan, sugar daddy Charlie Sheen and his sugar baby goddesses, Lindsay Lohan’s impending court case is falling a little on the importance scale.

As Lindsay, not a self-proclaimed sugar baby, faces felony grand theft charges, I can’t help but wonder where her sugar daddy is. I mean, aside from her real daddy, her really weird daddy, doesn’t she have some knight in shining armor to come through for her? Or is she just so miserable as a person, much less a sugar baby, that no one is interested in giving her the pleasure?

In the world of sugar daddy dating, looks are important (way more important than in traditional dating). Does Lindsay Lohan even measure up against the droves of gorgeous sugar babies trying to get their piece of the pie? I don’t know, I’m not a sugar daddy, but if I was (hypothetical), would I be Lindsay Lohan’s sugar daddy? I guess I’d have to get to know her first– or at least pay for the assurance of her not acting like a blundering drunk if I took her out.

I’d probably make her wear panties for the first half of the night (does the carpet match the curtain? Wait, there’d better not be carpet ladies!)

If you were a sugar daddy, would you consider Lindsay Lohan? Or is Bree Olson or Kacey Jordan more your style?

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Rewind to the moment when women, or sugar babies, began to realize their effect on men.

I can remember this vivid moment happening in my adult life, and let’s be honest, it’s really only your adult life that matters, anything before that is like the pre-qualifying round, if you make it, you can play.

If you were ever an athlete, growing up renders you unaware to the sexual powers your body possesses. The way the body performs and functions are the ways in which it’s measured, not in bed and not by the way it looks.

When I became aware of the sexual powers a lean strong body can hold over men of all ages, I chose to invest in its sustainability by spending time and money on maintaining it.

Sugar daddies love when, during moments of intimacy, you wrap a pair of strong legs around them, use core strength (thank you Pilates), stabilize a tight and erect torso, and disseminate your prowess all over them. It’s almost a perfect weapon, almost. Few sugar daddies have been able to withstand its power.

So… on that note… sugar babies really need to learn to invest in themselves more, and not just rely on sugar daddies for everything! Having sugar daddies in our lives is a treat, not to be taken for granted.

I mean, let’s face it, you expect a sugar daddy to be the only one to pay for a membership on sugar daddy dating sites like sugarsugar.com? Even before they’ve met any of you lovely ladies? That’s preposterous! Isn’t that like paying $100 to choose from door number 1, 2, or 3 and finding nothing on the other side? That is not fair—that is not winning!

Come on, meet a generous sugar daddy in the middle and get your own membership! Don’t be so helpless, if you can help it—

Things you can do to invest in yourself that may impress a sugar daddy:

• Pay for your own friggin’ sugar baby membership
• Be as active as possible! Go take a walk on the wild side and run your ass off—nobody likes a flabby sugar baby
• Wash your hair, brush it, and style it… daily- duh!
• Shop for your own clothes, or hire a personal stylist- how can you afford one? Well prioritize your finances, duh! – You are here to be a better sugar baby, not ask for a handout

Know your power as a sexual prowess.

Use it to your advantage.

Take ownership and responsibility of the care and well-being of yourself.

Can’t do these things—then you really have no business dating, sugar daddies or otherwise. Really, no joke.

Don’t waste a sugar daddy’s time, don’t waste your time.

Oh yeah, and don’t forget what I said about wrapping your legs around your sugar daddies face—works every time!

Thousands of sugar babies adorn the pages of SugarSugar.com, some with profile photos and some without. Those without photos, not surprisingly, don’t gain much of anything or a true online dating experience. The pics chosen for a sugar baby’s profile should have rhyme, reason and should be a good representation of who she is.

More often than not, photos chosen by sugar babies for their profiles do not seem to be in line with what they say they are seeking, like an angel with devil horns and a pitchfork on fire. It can be very conflicting and scary.

Want to spend more actual time with a generous sugar daddy that spoils you and less time looking for one? Then you’ll need to make sure your profile photos align with who you are and who you want to attract, that will cut down on the amount of time and energy you will spend in Onlinedatingville.

• Post multiple photos of yourself so sugar daddies can see what you really look like. Clear, unobtrusive face and full body shots paint a better picture of you than that one where you’re on your back, legs behind your head, knees at your ears, ready to receive a ram or rim job.

• Post photos of yourself doing your favorite extracurricular activities (no, not that). For example, if you like to golf, and a pot sugar daddy who also likes to golf sees your profile, without reading (sugar daddies rarely read profile words), he can tell you like to golf too and Bam! you now have something in common. All because you chose one photo over another

Uh, it’s called Winning!

• Try to keep switching up your main profile photo. You just never know if your profile got passed over because of poor lighting or an uncomplimentary shirt. Why not change it up a little and keep it fresh!

• What happened to the notion of “Less is more”? Anyone? Seriously… So many sugar babies choose more cleavage over less in their main profile photos! At least make it the second photo of your profile, it’ll seem LESS trashy.

• If you end up deciding to post a photo with more cleavage, ignoring my advice, then you might as well be anonymous too.

• Pregnant and wanting to be a sugar baby? Umm, please don’t…no, stop it…

• Please stop flipping upside down for a photo op. The camera goes the other way–

And…I’m officially speechless… Give me something to work with, will ya?

Contrary to popular belief, we are not all masters of sugar daddy dating, only some of us

Sugar babies can be new to the game as much as any other virgin-type, and then there will undoubtedly be questions as to the ‘how-to’. That’s where sugar baby mentors, (not dementors) like myself can lend a helping hand. There are always a ton of questions from every new sugar baby, questions like:

• What do sugar daddies expect?
• What can I expect from a sugar daddy?
• Do sugar daddies like full-figured women?
• How do I make my profile stand out?
• What if I have kids?

Those are but a few of the  millions (blown out of proportion) of questions asked by new sugar babies… Instead of thinking in terms of sugar daddies and sugar babies, let’s swap those two terms for men and women.

Does that change the equation much? Because it should… Sugar daddy and sugar baby  CAN be easily substituted with men and women.

The only thing that really changes is the notion that I’m not expected to financially support my man, THANK GOD!

The sooner you can accept the terms of that arrangement, the better. Sugar daddy dating is no different than traditional or conventional dating, save for the fact that my sugar daddy won’t be mooching off of me and couch-crashing like other men have done before.

Doesn’t that sound nice? Yes, I thought so…

Let’s change out the ‘sugar daddy’ and ‘sugar baby’ terms for ‘men’ and ‘women’ in the SB queries and see if we can’t answer those questions in laymen terms to get a better grasp of sugar daddy dating, and well, dating in general:

• What do men expect?

The age old question, right? What do men expect from us? Nothing but the best comes to mind.

Men expect to have their cake and eat it too, so that’s what we have to make them think they’re getting! Give men enough of yourself to have them believe they are getting what they want, all the while preserving who you are.

If you are strong and confidant in who that is, a mere show or flattery will not cause you a disservice, I promise.

Don’t wanna give anything of yourself? Well, then you have no business dating period. The more you are, the more you can give without shaking the foundation of who that is.

• What can I expect from men?

Nothing. No, seriously though — Second verse, same as the first… What can you really expect form anyone in your life, sugar daddy or otherwise? Nada, zip, zilch, nichts!

Nothing. Expect nothing from anyone and you will have success in all you do. Do for others, sugar daddies included, simply because you want to. Not for any other reason.

Everyone else is watching out for number One, why shouldn’t you? You’ve got to take care of yourself, or no one will.

“Expect nothing and appreciate everything” is a great dating motto to adopt.

• Do men like full-figured women?

Well yes, some men do. Some men like long hair, others like short. Some daddies like petite brunettes while others prefer leggy blondes.

We come in all sizes, shapes and colors. Sugar daddy’s wants are no exception to this rule.

Post a great photo of yourself and see what happens. That’s all you can do. If a man thinks you’re attractive, he will contact you. Do not force the issue, men are into all kinds of women, maybe you’re just not his type. Don’t take it personal and move on!

• How do I make my profile stand out?

Making your profile stand out on any dating site can be as easy as 1-2-3.

Cliche as it seems, 1-2-3 is all you need. Number one: second guess yourself. Don’t write in a rush or half-ass it, we can tell. Number two: this is not a personals ad, EVERYONE likes nice things, wants to be spoiled, and take long walks on the beach. Lastly: Please please please write ANYTHING but trite things that everyone else writes, make your profile unique and authentic and it WILL stand out

• What if I have kids?

So? What if I have a dog or a cat and three beta fish? What if I am married? What if men throwing rotten tomatoes (or toh-mah-toes) at me turns me on? Does having kids, fish, or a tomato fetish prevent you from dating? If you’re insecure about it, sure. Otherwise, who gives a flying f*ck?

Don’t let your dating life get in the way of things that are truly important to you. Make it a healthy enmeshed marriage. If it’s important, tell it like it is…

You see? Deciphering new sugar baby questions can be easy and fun! That’s the whole notion of sugar daddy dating and dating in general, it should be easy and fun– or why in the hell do it?

Put yourself out there and date up a storm!! What have you got to lose anyway — yourself? Nah… but that would be a good trip!